Baby Jeds

Not since the days of his wonky nose has anyone ever says Jed looks like his mommy--
Not Once.
But, then again, these photos are all the evidence one needs to realize that, yes, I've given birth to a small clone of my adorable spouse.

I'm still holding out for blue eyes. :c)

So here's your quiz: Which is Perry Jed and which is Michael Jed?

Cannibal!

One particularly long and dreary day back when I was pregnant, as Michael sleepily offered family prayer, he said "...and please bless this baby that it will nourish and strengthen our bodies." Ever since that day, I have viewed my apparently cannibalistic husband with some secret suspicion. And day before yesterday I entered the bedroom to find my fears confirmed--my growling husband sheepishly caught gnawing on the poor baby's arm!!!

Splash!

Did you know that our little chunk-a-licious has such a high body fat percentage that he literally floats? Not his head, obviously, but last night Baby and I took a bath together and as long as I keep a steady hand under his noggin, the rest of him easily floats in the bath.

Thus far, Baby hasn't seemed all that hot about bath time. His favorite part, actually, seems to be when mom puts him on a little towel in front of the space heater and lets him have some "nakey" time before the bath. His arms flail about and he lets his legs lurch him around from side to side, enjoying full diaper freedom. Ah!

Yesterday, however, during our first mommy/baby bath time, Baby discovered what bath time is really all about: SPLASHING!!! I placed him on my stretched out legs, head towards me, feet out over my knees towards my feet. At first he just laid there, thoughtful, his usual bath expression of quiet enjoyment. At once, though, it seemed that he realized "Hey, I can kick these legs around in here! Hmmmm!" An experimental kick. A small smile swept across his face. Another kick, this time with both legs. Next thing we knew, he was going at it--full leg kicks, arms flinging about, water splashing everywhere and a HUGE smile pasted across that little fat face. Splash splash splash! He kept it going for more than thirty minutes and probably would have continued to the point of exhaustion if he hadn't started to look chilly.

I think bath time is a hit. The happiest we've ever seen our little piglet.

Chunky Cheeks, Big Boy Clothes, and Hondas

Look, our beautiful baby is starting to get chunky cheeks!!! He's also decided to start sleeping at night... a very popular decision among the parent folks. I came in from a meeting this morning to find quite a sight in my bedroom--two adorable sleeping men, complete with headphones and laptop. Funny boys of mine!
Happy boy in his big boy clothes! Waving his arms around to tell his Mommy how much he LOVES having his diaper changed!
The two long, lean boys, Michael and Britton, do some brotherly bonding changing the oil in Britton's Honda.

Num-nums Time!

Of late, I have made a shocking discovery. I don't have a baby boy--I have a piglet.

Those who know Jed won't be surprised. Grunting and snorting and letting loose huge, noxious farts--common public events with my little darling--seem a normal "man-child" sort of thing to do. Not until you see him feeding, however, will you be convinced. You don't even need to see him feeding, actually. All you need to do is be near enough to HEAR him nurse.

He lets Mom know that it's "num-nums time" by a series of grunts and the occasional demanding squawk. These hunger calls quickly escalate if not paid immediate and total attention into a loud cry of pure suffering, as if his cold, cruel, thoughtless mother was driving hot spikes beneath his poor innocent nails. Fortunately, the suffering is ameliorated by the sight of his beloved momma's breast. His eyes widen, breath quickens into hyperventilation, and he begins straining in anticipation and desire... food, at last!

Latching on for my child takes on the glow of pure art. First, joyfully rubbing face in the food source. Then he begins grunting, banging his head against the breast, frantic for the food to come but for some reason all I'm getting, Mom, is my hand which I've put in the way and it's driving me craaaaaaaazzzzzzyyyyy! Soon, he accompanies the head banging with flailing arms, wildly kicking legs, spurting milk coating his entire face, and wails of anguish. The num-nums! The num-nums! Why, oh why, do they not appear!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Mom, meanwhile, attempts to hold all body parts down while getting the kid to latch on. At last, success. Baby latches on and sucks thirstily, mom mops up the mess with whatever she's got in reach. Settling into his meal, Baby is happy. He puts one arm above, one below, reaching over his head, and happily scrunches his hands, grabbing whatever is in sight. Feet at the other end kick in rhythm. Munch munch munch. No doubt that this boy enjoys his meal--gulping, sucking noises testify that momma's milk is the BEST! Grunting, gulping, gasping, he emerges from the food source with a sigh of pure pleasure, head flung back, milk dripping down his cheeks and chin and pooling into his neck. Aahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!

Laid back across my lap, bliss written across his face, my little piglet sleeps.

Pulling our hair out

Ok, not really. Jed is though. Earlier he managed to get a really solid grip on a lock of his own hair and started to pull. This clearly upset him, which only make him grip tighter and pull harder. I tried to shake his hand loose, but I had a hard time trying to get him to let go. He pulled his scalp so hard it turned red and then white. Poor kid. I think he surprised himself. M.

2.5% Body Fat

I've found that my desire to get fit has gone way up. And I don't just mean fit, I mean gain 28 more pounds of body weight, and then take my body fat percentage down to 2.5 percent. I wasn't quite sure why this was until I realized that the only thing on at 4:00AM are all the exercise machine advertisements. I've been getting up at 4 and 5 every once and awhile to be with Baby Jed who is particularly alert during those hours. I haven't fallen victim to "the Bean" or the "Abersizer" yet, but I bet those guys get a lot of business from people like me. Brain isn't working, my defenses are down, I'm not rational. It's totally unethical to take advantage of that mental state. Just kidding.

Men and Lentils

My two adorable men snuggling on the couch. I never visualized myself living in a household full of testosterone, but thus far I find I rather enjoy my boys.


This week we learned something new from baby Jed. Apparently he really, really, really, really doesn't like it when his mommy has lentils for dinner. Poor kid stayed up crying all night long after my delicious new lentil dish! He was fussy even for a couple days afterward. Mom is fussy, too--no garlic, no onions, no chili peppers, no lentils??!! That pretty much eliminates, um, my entire diet!! I never realized how much spicy cooking I did until this little kid came along. I've been on allrecipes.com a lot lately, gotta expand my "boring food" cooking horizons.

Since the lentils got out of our systems, however, Jed has settled back into his usual happy little self. Today he sat around and gurgled and grunted like a little piglet all day, didn't cry even once. We're trying to settle into a night-time routine with a bath and relaxation time for baby after 8 or 8:30... but turns out mom and dad aren't very good at a routine. Poor kid is wildly varying between bed at 8 and bed at midnight. We all need practice with a routine, apparently.

Baby in the bath!

Note the nicely brushed hair in the first photograph that looks just like his daddy.



Note the hugely ginormous forehead in this photograph -- distinctly reminiscent of his momma!